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Archive for the ‘Fun Stuff’ Category

NEW ELEMENT DISCOVERED: Governmentium (Gv),
UPDATE: Lawrence, KS

Livermore Laboratories has discovered the heaviest element yet known to science. The new element, Governmentium (Gv), has one neutron, 28 assistant neutrons, 98 deputy neutrons, and 219 assistant deputy neutrons, giving it an atomic mass of 345.

These 345 particles are held together by forces called morons, which are surrounded by vast quantities of lepton-like particles called peons.
 
Since Governmentium has no electrons, it is inert; however, it can be detected, because it impedes every reaction with which it comes into contact. A tiny amount of Governmentium can cause a reaction that would normally take less than a second, to take from four days to four years to complete.

Governmentium has a normal half-life of 2- 6 years; it does not decay, but instead undergoes a reorganization in which a portion of the assistant neutrons and deputy neutrons exchange places.

In fact, Governmentium’ s mass will actually increase over time, since each reorganization will cause more morons to become neutrons, forming isodopes.
 
This characteristic of moron promotion leads some scientists to believe that Governmentium is formed whenever morons reach a critical concentration. This hypothetical quantity is referred to as critical morass.
 
When catalyzed with money, Governmentium becomes Administratium, an element that radiates just as much energy as Governmentium since it has half as many peons but twice as many morons.

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Attn: Entrepreneurs

Everyone knows that if you are going to operate a business in today’s world you need a domain name. It is advisable to look at the domain name selected as others see it and not just as you think it looks.

Failure to do this may result in situations such as the following (legitimate) companies who deal in everyday humdrum products and services but clearly didn’t give their domain names enough consideration:

1. A site called ‘Who Represents‘ where you can find the name of the agent that represents a celebrity.

http://www.whorepresents.com

2. Looking for a pen? Look no further than Pen Island at

http://www.penisland.net

3. Need a therapist? Try Therapist Finder at

http://www.therapistfinder.com

4. And now, we have the Mole Station Native Nursery, based in New South Wales:

http://www.molestationnursery.com

5. If you’re looking for computer software, there’s always

http://www.ipanywhere.com

6. Welcome to the First Cumming Methodist Church

http://www.cummingfirst.com

7. Then, of course, there’s these brainless art designers, and their whacky website:

http://www.speedofart.com

8. Want to holiday in Lake Tahoe? Try their brochure website at

http://www.gotahoe.com

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Every Breath You Take

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Tennis Racket Man

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